Sometimes relationships cease to bring joy. The house, in which love and harmony reigned, is filled with problems, everyday boring life, and disappointment now. When passion and love fade away between a man and a woman, different temptations often arise in a relationship.
The desire of men to find a new home for the soul often pushes them for cheating because they start looking for single ladies for dating. In most cases, such a solution to temporary problems leads to a breakup. However, this path is chosen by the weak-minded people. For those who want to save their relationships, psychologists have a number of recommendations on how to resist temptation.
Main sources of temptations in relationships
The statistics are ruthless: over 60% of couples faced cheating. And even though the percentage is high, most of them say that cheating is a disgusting thing and they will never behave like this. Unfortunately, sometimes we fall under the power of desires, which subsequently lead to breakups. It seems that serious relationships after 40 are impossible. But still, if you don’t want to stay alone, reconsider your lifestyle and learn about the main sources of temptations in relationships that can lead to a broken heart over time.
1. Escape from everyday life
When people feel stuck in a routine, when they don’t feel joy or excitement, when the future looks exactly like the dull present, an affair on the side can be an escape from the hateful everyday life. Of course, this will not change anything – your problems will remain the same, but you will forget about all this for at least an hour every month or two.
2. Joy of anticipation
Marriage experts advise all couples who are together for a long time to diversify their sex as much as possible. By starting an affair, people get such a variety. They appoint a date to be together, they look forward to it, they talk about how great it will be, they think about what to wear to look amazing, and most importantly, they are going to enjoy it. If all couples in love felt the same way, they would never have problems in their relationships.
3. Feeling of being desired
Many people feel loved, but they don’t feel attractive or desired. Your girlfriend no longer gives you affection and love, right? Life has become a monotonous routine. You lack the intensity of passions that you want to experience again. And the other woman tempts, which suggests that this other woman will solve your problems. Usually, these feelings are deceiving, and the relationship with someone else will bring nothing but disappointment. So, you have to learn how to overcome temptations. Spend your energy on renewing feelings and emotions in your relationships, and not on overcoming the consequences of temptation.
4. Lack of touches and physical affection
It’s much easier for us to live without sex than without touching. During an hour-long date with another person, sex can take as little as 10 minutes, and the remaining 50 minutes go to hugs. Or there may be no sex at all. Some people are willing to risk everything, just to feel gentle touches on their faces. Another thing is to have someone next to you to talk to. Sadly, many couples hardly speak to each other. And of course, this leads to deterioration of relations.
How to avoid temptation in a relationship
Love bleaks over time. Attachment and responsibility for the well-being of the relationships come to the fore. But people are faced with everyday problems: lack of housing, lack of money, and the birth of a child brings not only joy but also requires a full commitment, both material and moral. This is where the desire to distract from unresolved problems arises and cheating seems a way to solve some issues. It is necessary to analyze the situation and understand how to avoid the temptations in a relationship.
1. Avoid meeting temptation
The brain sees an attractive object and realizes that it will bring a lot of pleasure, so it wants to get it as soon as possible. It is natural for us to enjoy casual flirting when we meet someone attractive, and there is nothing wrong with that. But you shouldn’t strive for this since all people tend to always want more, and this will likely go beyond flirting, and, at the most piquant moment, you will no longer be able to stop. If the brain doesn’t see the object of temptation, then an ancient impulse is not triggered in it.
2. Don’t hide your thoughts
Be honest about those who are interested in you and those you find attractive. Let’s say you liked someone at work and paid a little attention to that person. If you don’t talk about this flirtatious conversation right away, a small omission will appear. And after a while, there will be a lot of these omissions and random flirting, and all this will turn into a great sexual secret that you will never dare to reveal, and about which you will constantly think and fantasize. And in the end, one awkward thought, with which the omission began, can lead you to someone else’s bed.
3. Find the reasons for your desire
Determine why you tend to cheat on your woman. For example, it can be banal boredom in your sex life, dissatisfaction in your relationship, or just the thought that there is someone better than your woman. Of course, relationships become boring and monotonous over time, but cheating is not an option. If you have thoughts of having sex with someone else, then this is the time when you need to put the maximum effort into a relationship. If you identify and eliminate the reason why you are led to temptation, then you can save the relationship.
4. Put yourself in the shoes of your loved one
How to resist temptation in a relationship? Well, imagine that you cheated on your woman, and she found out about it. Think about what will be her reaction? What kind of explosion of negative emotions will she experience, and will she be able to recover from such moral humiliation? Your partner will hate you and, most likely, she will leave you. You will suffer from this perhaps even more than your woman. She may never know about cheating, but a normal relationship should always be built on love and trust. So, always think from the point of view of your loved ones before you decide to take such a step.
5. Think about the consequences
Be aware of the consequences of your action. What will you lose if you succumb to temptation? How will you feel if you lose everything? Your life may change radically in a second. Don’t think about the person with whom you want to cheat on your woman, but think about how you would feel if your partner suddenly leaves you, and you have to go further alone. How does it feel to think about the loss of the person with whom you have shared your life in recent years? Is this temptation worth losing everything you have?
What to do if it’s hard to resist temptation: main techniques
Any temptation in relationships often prompts you to satisfy your desire here and now, without thinking about the consequences. This is due to the excitement of the areas of the brain responsible for the anticipation of pleasure. It is the expectation that the possession of an object will bring us pleasant sensations that motivates us to do something. We have main techniques on how to properly respond to temptation:
1. Start with a break
The temptation is very close, you just have to stretch your hand, but you hesitate to do it. Well, experts advise men to take a short break. Whenever possible, take time to relax and think carefully. Now you need to weigh the pros and cons if you still succumb to the temptation. How will you benefit from this? How important is it to you in this situation? What problems can be if you succumb to temptation? When considering, breathe as calmly and slowly as possible, try to take a sitting or lying position. Thus, you will be able to make up your mind faster.
2. Blame yourself
How to avoid temptation in a relationship? If you begin to feel that you need to urgently satisfy your desire at any cost, blame yourself for the fact that your behavior resembles a five-year-old child. An adult man should be ashamed to follow his whims. A one-time satisfaction of one momentary desire can be followed by adverse consequences, which you may regret all your life. For example, cheating on your loved one with another woman will ruin your relationship, which can lead to a breakup. Is the satisfaction of desire worth such losses? Most likely, it is not.
3. Distract yourself
Obsessive thoughts can bother you for several days, and sometimes months. They arise in the mind involuntarily, against our will. But is the idea of succumbing to temptation becoming more and more intrusive by the minute? If yes, then overcoming temptation, distract yourself with some business, switch your attention to something else in order to forget about the desire that has arisen. It can be talking, watching TV, answering emails, helping passers-by. By the way, an interesting hobby not only brightens up the insipid everyday life, but also opens up unrealized talents in you, and even becomes a new source of income.
4. Praise yourself
We were taught from childhood that it is immodest to praise ourselves. But what if we tell you that saying good things about yourself is simply necessary? Think of times in your own life where you have already had to resist temptation that arose, after which you may have felt a sense of pride and even more satisfaction than you would get by succumbing to temptation. Praise yourself for your ability to discipline yourself, tell yourself that you know how to resist temptation. Don’t be ashamed of your own achievements – you need to boast about them. You are not just lucky, but you put in the effort and got the result.
5. Reward your persistence
And this is one of the most important ways to fight temptations. If the process of overcoming the temptation is already over and you have managed to feel your willpower, you need to encourage or reward yourself. Your prize shouldn’t be material: reward yourself with pleasant communication from which you can enjoy, give yourself the joy of watching your favorite movie, take time on this day to spend it the way you have always wanted. You deserve it!
It is natural for people to be weak in the face of temptation. But resisting the temptation is a sign that you may be responsible for yourself and your partner. True love comes from working on relationships, respect for each other, caring, and patience. So, how to fight temptation? Develop your relationship and avoid dangerous situations where the risk of cheating increases! Perhaps you should go on a trip together, or you just need to talk to your loved one, understand your true desires and needs of your partner, and become close again as before. You need to build a relationship with one woman. Get to know her, take care of her, and love her!
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