When you first start dating a new person, there are more questions than answers. Where do we go on a date, how long will it take to fall for each other, how soon should we sleep with each other? Is it appropriate to ask for more? With dating, you never know what to expect since every experience is different. Some might marry after a week of knowing each other. Others go on dates for months before they decide to go for more. But when to be exclusive in dating?
What is exclusive dating?
Exclusive dating is more than casual dating, but not quite a relationship yet. It is a crush test of your partner-to-be. Most importantly, you don’t have other flings. You don’t sleep with anyone else, although the test is not passed yet. Both partners look into each other more precisely, go on more dates, see each other. But they are not ready to put a label on a relationship.
What does exclusive dating mean? It means that you don’t live with each other and spend every day together, but don’t include others in your relationship. For example, you stop liking other girls on social media or text them to get a quick sex, and she doesn’t go on Tinder dates either. Although you are not official yet, mutually exclusive dating means that you both understand where this is going.
Exclusive dating arrangement can be awkward as hell, especially if you move at a different speed. For example, if you already want a committed relationship with your date, but she still hesitates, you need to define exclusive dating for her. You don’t want your wife-to-be to be going on different dates, right?
Exclusivity is one of the most frequent dating issues. How long should we be exclusive before committing to a relationship? Does this status give me any privileges? Will I be a fool and a coward to ask to wait?
Don’t worry; most people don’t know when to transition from being exclusive to an actual relationship.
Main facts on exclusive dating
If you’re using any hot women dating site, you better get that knowledge! Every other exclusive dating app provides tips and tricks for its members. But if you want to acquire that knowledge without learning from specialists, going to thousands of dating sites, or just want to date in real life, we compiled a list of main facts on exclusive dating you need to know:
1. You go on dates
Many dates. Exclusive dating doesn’t mean you already passed through the dating stage. It doesn’t mean that it’s time to spend every night on the sofa watching soap operas together. If you even want to pass this stage and go to a committed relationship, don’t lose your grip! Keep on going on dates, just with the same person! It doesn’t mean you don’t have anything to show at this point. You still want to impress the girl. In most cases, there are lots of things to observe even after the marriage.
2. You still can flee
In a battle of exclusive dating vs relationship, exclusivity still wins. Although you get a girl’s heart for sure, there is much less responsibility. You don’t live together, share budget, trap into routine, argue a lot. In some sense, the exclusive stage of dating is the sweetest. You are in love, yet reality didn’t hit you yet with boredom. Moreover, you can still refuse to date, saying that things didn’t work out as expected, and it will not be as harsh as a breakup.
3. It usually happens after five dates
Dating is an exciting concept. Some people see each other once in a week to have sex and talk, and others like to take it slowly, feeding ducks in the park and holding hands. Either way is great as long as it is consensual and enjoyed by both of you. Dating comes in all shapes and forms. But talking about exclusivity after just one date means lying to yourself. Why would a person who saw you once cancel all of their dates? If you are actively into dating, you know that one has to compare to get the “best deal.” But if you already went on 5-7 dates, it means that your comrade likes you to say the least. If they still wanted to see you after so many meetings, you can hint at exclusivity after a while.
4. You start saying “we/us” instead of “me and her”
It means that you already perceive your tandem as a couple. Whatever stage you’re at, if you start talking about mutual plans and deciding on what to do next, things are going great for you! If she does the same when referring to mutual activities, don’t be shy and ask whether she is okay with being exclusive.
5. Some can introduce their date to parents/friends
It doesn’t necessarily happen at the exclusive stage, but if your partner wants to introduce you to someone, it means that you are not already a fling. Some people like to do that immediately, and others won’t do that for years, so don’t be too flattered or discouraged. Also, there might be some confusion as to what to label your relationship. Since you are technically not her boyfriend yet, she might introduce you as a friend or a love interest or abstain from labels altogether. Respect that and don’t be upset. At this stage, defining a relationship is hard. You need to understand that.
6. It is time to delete your Tinder pages
It is okay to do that sooner or later, but if you are exclusive, it is inappropriate to leave your Tinder pages, let alone text other people. At the exclusive stage, every romantic manifestation towards any other person can be counted as cheating. So if you don’t want to be an emotional or a physical cheater, you can forget sliding into someone’s DMs or going on some more dates.
7. You can already confess your feelings
Those three words, “I love you,” can be awkward as hell when said at the wrong time. At the dating stage, it might be creepy or overly passionate to confess in love. But if we’re talking about exclusive dating, expressing your feelings becomes normal. Since you stopped at one person, things are going great. There is no need to be too timid or being afraid to confess.
8. You can start doing “the nasty stuff”
People are afraid to show their human side at the beginning stage of a relationship. This includes being scared to wee at your girlfriend’s house, burp, or do something not very pleasant. But if you are exclusive, you can take that façade down and already show your natural side. This stage bugs every couple. Is it too soon to talk about bodily fluids or spit food when laughing? At this stage, it is okay.
9. You hold hands in public
Flings never do that. If your partner started holding your hand and kissing you on a train, it is a sign of a serious relationship. Most people avoid PDA altogether; that is why lovey-dovey couples are an absolute nightmare for everyone. But as a soon-to-be-couple, who can judge you?
10. You spend holidays together
It is an awkward stage when you need to decide whether calling them to celebrate your birthday would be alright. But as a couple, you have every right to spend Valentine’s day together, hold family dinners, call each other when someone is sick, or spend New Years together. It should be natural with time to let each other into your personal space.
When to be exclusive in dating?
Many people hesitate to make it official. At the same time, you need to realize that it’s exclusive dating, but not a relationship. Don’t be shy to ask where the connection is going when you feel genuinely curious. It should be a mundane practice to learn about stuff that bothers you. Are you afraid the connection will degrage to meetings and casual sex? Just ask your partner if they are satisfied with what you are having at the moment.
When to be exclusive in dating? When you feel like it. If you are afraid or shy to ask if they feel the same way, it’s too early for a commitment. It would help if you established some bonds before going into a connection. Open up, share some stories, and loosen up.
Exclusive dating is just a natural step before going for a serious relationship. You shouldn’t be afraid of opening up to your partner about all the trepidations and ask them openly: are they ready to admit that you are their one and only? Because if yes, then it can be the start of something beautiful and unforgettable. If your partner agrees to go exclusive, be sure you already won their heart, and the connection is going to go upwards from this place. Don’t hesitate and may luck be with you!
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