What is a toxic girlfriend? Main signs of behavior

Table of contents:

  1. How to deal with a toxic girl. Behavior rules
  2. How to know if your girlfriend is toxic -- what to consider?
  3. Conclusion about interacting with such ladies

Every man dreams about a robust and healthy union with his chosen one. But it happens that women's behavior can be toxic and cause a breakup. Many people understand toxicity as ignoring the partner's desires and needs and showing disrespect. The signs and manifestations are much more.

what is a toxic girlfriend

One common manifestation of toxicity is devaluation. In a healthy couple, partners support each other and share problems and worries. A toxic partner does not empathize. The lady may even show mockery of your fears. Depreciation can manifest in different ways, but the problem is leveling problems, feelings, emotions, and worries in any of these.

Mocking, snide jokes should also make a man look closer to his chosen one. Humor is different, but if it is offensive, it is not funny. One-time bad jokes happen to all. However, if the partner does it permanently, it is worth saying that this behavior is unpleasant. It will get results in an average couple. A toxic lady will not admit her mistakes and will probably show devaluation.

Aggression is peculiar to men, but fair sex can also show it. Let it be said that such behavior is not the norm. Neither is violating personal boundaries. Family is two independent and self-sufficient people bound by love and respect. They are comfortable and enjoy being together but are not dependent and respect their partner's personal space, opinions, and desires. If your partner shows aggression and resentment in the attempt to defend the boundaries and says that you show selfishness in this way, you are probably dealing with a toxic young lady.

Toxic ladies are characterized by total control. Checking correspondence, jealousy, distrust, and constant suspicions are not the norm. If there is no trust between loved ones, there is no point in continuing the relationship. Paranoid suspicions will not bring anything good to the union. On the contrary, they will destroy both lovers and ruin any desire to keep feeling alive. In doing so, such young ladies use double standards. Something that a man is not allowed to do, the lady may well commit herself. For example, she can check her partner's phone, but checking her gadget can turn into a scandal and claims that you don't trust her.

All manifestations do not necessarily occur around the clock. It is widespread that after such an episode, the lady will show care, using the "carrot and stick" model. The story will continue over and over again. In addition, the manifestation of aggression may intensify. It is normal to admit your mistakes, change your ways and make amends, but when this becomes a pattern, and the guy doesn't see a change in his lady, it shows that she is toxic.

Manipulation and blackmail should not take place. It is necessary to stop such manifestation instantly. After missing the situation, the manipulator realizes that he has succeeded and the scale will only increase in subsequent times. All problems should be talked about. You can resolve many misunderstandings in the dialogue and confirm suspicions that you are dealing with a toxic partner.

How to deal with a toxic girl. Behavior rules

If you have noticed the above signs in your chosen one, you must know how to behave and act correctly to keep your partnership. It is sometimes impossible, but you should get out of such a relationship competently. The sooner you realize the lady's behavior destroys your psychological state, the better it is. Don't think a toxic partner is understandable; you can recognize it immediately without getting caught. Falling in love often clouds the mind, and we find excuses and explanations, taking the desired for real.

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Do not allow yourself to break boundaries. Not everyone knows how to say "no," so it's worth learning. Explain this to your partner. Keep your temper and stay calm. The ultimate goal of the toxic lady is to get you emotional. It would be best if you did not get involved in the game. Keep the conversation under your control, don't give in to manipulation. Be straightforward and be clear about your opinion and position. However, your behavior will not change your partner. Talking honestly and openly and offering to see a specialist is necessary. Family psychologists help to understand, find the cause and overcome the problem. It is essential to understand that toxicity has some reasons. When you know them, the following actions will become clear. The ground for a lady's toxic behavior can be childhood trauma, bullying, parenting patterns, painful previous love experiences, and mental disorders. All these problems are solvable; if you want to keep the couple together, you must help the lady deal with them. Again, psychotherapy sessions are an effective solution.

How to know if your girlfriend is toxic - what to consider?

If you feel discomfort in the couple, insecurity, and devaluation, your union is toxic. Companions often confuse the coldness of their chosen one with unapproachability. However, a poisonous partner shows indifference. The gifts and actions do not impress her and offer a consumer attitude toward men. It may seem that she sucks out of your energy and all vitality.

The woman in a toxic couple demands constant attention, but it is never enough. She gradually ousts his companion from the life of friends, focusing all his attention on herself. It is especially true when friends recommend looking closer at the beloved and hinting at her energy vampirism. Such friends immediately fall into disgrace with a lady; they become envious and unfriendly, wishing only bad things for their companion.

The emotional swings of the partner are also a signal. Frequent mood swings, unfounded and unwarranted, should make a guy suspicious. An essential aspect of a toxic person is cyclicality. It is clear that we are all human, characterized by mood swings, psychological instability, and other manifestations, but they are all temporary. A toxic person changes their behavior and mood in circles for no reason.

A toxic lady will show in every way that no matter how hard the man tries, it is not enough. She will discuss and devalue every action you take. It isn't elementary to build a dialogue with such a person. If it works, then there is a chance to save the relationship. Otherwise, it is better to stop destructive communication.

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Distance yourself from your partner, and say you have decided to leave. Be ready so that this process will take time. After the breakup, you must understand whether you also need therapy. The psychologist will help build personal boundaries to work through all the difficult moments. If you have the strength to cope without a specialist, you should know the following. In any case, do not look for any reason to contact or meet your ex. Limit yourself as much as possible from this person. Keep yourself busy with hobbies, work, and friends.

Restore emotional health. Do not start a new relationship. It will not help; you can even hurt the newly chosen one. After a toxic relationship, you need time to forget, cool down, make plans, and understand what you want from life. It is essential to analyze the behavior of a former loved one to remember when a toxic relationship became noticeable. Such an alliance causes much pain, so you must give yourself time to heal.

Conclusion about interacting with such ladies

An alliance with a toxic lover is not a verdict. It is possible to establish interaction and preserve feelings without damaging the psyche. The main thing is not to accept the role of the victim. Your goal is a healthy connection between two loving people. It is essential to understand that it is up to both partners to work on this. It makes no sense to play one-way, and it is better to separate in that case. 

The man has to be brave and self-sufficient. Even after deciding to keep the relationship, you must be ready to leave. If your chosen one feels you will not dare to take this step, she will hardly change her behavior. And the manifestation of toxicity can increase, on the contrary, because she will feel the weakness.

A submissive pattern of behavior is the wrong solution. The toxic madam seeks to do just that, but she will never be satisfied, no matter how hard you try. You have to express your dissatisfaction and discomfort. It is sometimes possible to solve the problem with the lady in a dialogue. Some girls don't know that the guy doesn't like some points simply because he kept quiet about it.

It is best to negotiate everything with the lover on the shore. Many problems become noticeable initially, but people idealize each other, turn a blind eye to many things, and do not give due importance. And when the alliance drags on, it's much harder to get out of it. Love and enjoy each other but leave the mind cold.

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