Senior Dating: Single Dad Dating General Guidelines

When you grow older, relationships start to convey a different connotation. For now, looks don’t matter that much, but reliability and trust come first. With years, you understand that whatever you like in people, isn’t always what’s good for you, and you inevitably start being less of a romantic and more of a materialistic pal. So what makes people change so much and often choose a less cheerful, but a more realistic partner? With years, we all understand that fate forms us into what we are now.

Main Reasons to Date a Single Dad

Who makes the best husband? Only a man who’s been in a relationship, who has kids and, consequently, who understands how to love and how to give that love off. A man who’s been through thick and thin, and, most importantly, who has brought up a good citizen and a strong, capable person (hopefully) on his own. So, what to expect from dating a single dad and what’s best about dating a single dad?

Single dads know how to love

Millions are proud of single moms. But why don’t we give single dads as many credits? They are rarer to meet, they are sure financially stable (you need to earn some money to sustain your child’s living, right?), they are kind and thoughtful, they know how to cook and handle emergencies. Whatever happened between a single father and his ex-wife doesn’t matter, it’s in the past. But how a father treats his child, can indicate a lot. If we see that a kid is well-nourished, intelligent and is able to socialize, we can conclude that it’s a happy child who’s living a good life. He or she is loved in the family. But do you know how hard it is for the dad to substitute a mother? Yes, it’s rather hard. So if the dad manages to do so, he is definitely worth your attention.

Single dads are mature

When a man becomes a father, it doesn’t mean anything yet. You know, in the tradition of old days, child’s life almost always relies on the mother’s abilities to take care of a child, whilst the father can be aside from every family issue. Is this man a father? Technically, yes. But is he a DAD? It’s hard to tell as long as the child sees him every once in a while, and “the dad” doesn’t even know his child’s birthday. You see, you don’t need to obtain too many brain cells to become a father, but it definitely takes maturity to become a dad to someone.

Biologically, a kid feels his mother almost on an ethereal level. They need their mother, understand when momma is upset and need her the most, even to live. But a child doesn’t need a father that much biologically, let’s face it. So to be needed and remembered, a dad needs to earn this title (as crazy as it sounds, it’s true). Being a dad requires huge work of coordinating with mom, being present every time something happens, defending his child and the mother, being sober and put together, always thinking and analyzing. That’s what being a father is. So you see, if a man knows how to take care of a child and be a role model, he is definitely capable to take care of himself, and of you. He is mature enough to make wise decisions and take responsibility.

Single dads are consistent and reliable

Dating a single dad means being with a consistent person. While he doesn’t have to be as consistent with you because he doesn’t owe you anything yet, it will be definitely more constant in his calls, questions, and offers. Do you know what differentiates younger guys and fathers? Fathers are reliable. It’s something you are not born with necessarily; this trait is obtained through years of experience. While no one really put this knowledge into the heads of younger unmarried men, they often have no idea how to take care of anyone besides themselves. The difference between having a child and being a child is obvious. Younger guys are just children of their mommas. They can lie, invent something to break curfew, and run away with their friends. Such a man may even meet a girl online and abandon her later. Not every guy is necessarily like this, but if he is a single child, and you know that he still doesn’t call his mother just because he “forgot,” be sure that he’ll treat you the same, especially if he sees a mother figure in you.

But if a guy has kids himself, he doesn’t have such a privilege to be random and spontaneous. If a man raises a child by himself, his life is kind of built around his child’s schedule. So if you talk to him, at least you’ll know where he will be in a certain hour.

Single dads are providers

Single dads often work for two to provide a good living for them and their children. Do you know how traumatic it would be for a man to be left without his wife, and not be able to provide for a kid emotionally and financially? Single dads are often so stigmatized, it’s painful to watch. That is why in order not to be pressed by society, he has to be constantly working on well-being and providing goods for his beloved child.

Single dads know how to provide comfort for their children and closest circle. Moreover, they are good at sharing. They love sharing memories, emotions, attention and so on.

Main Problems with Dating a Single Dad

However, single dad dating is not that easy. These relationships are a little bit more complicated since there are some other issues you’ll have to deal with, including his family, being new to the crew, his children and exes. Dating a single dad relationship can be difficult, but overall, it’s very rewarding. It’s worth the effort if you know that he’s a good person and you will be secure. Let’s see which problems you can face.

His kids will always come first. This is not the problem at first glance. However, it’s what you think. But practically, the issue is much broader. The child is often the creator of this problem. Kids are vulnerable and often hostile to strangers, so they sure won’t be happy if someone intrudes into their life (especially if your date has a pre-teen daughter). Kids are impressionable, and they might think that daddy will forget them or leave them for another woman. And while you’ll have no plans to take him away, the father will always listen to his child, and often take their side. He will give away more time, money and effort because their children mean the world to them, and it’s stupid to be envious or to deny this fact.

The ex. Now we’ll teach you how to date a single dad with baggage. And this baggage is not his children! We are talking about never-ending ties with his hysterical ex who hits like an ax. Yes, she can be annoying, jealous, calling “on the occasion to arrange a meeting to strictly talk about their children,” and she is prone to not let you live in serenity as soon as she knows you exist. We suggest you talk to your date and build some walls (made of stone, preferably) because some women just don’t like to give away the first position. But for now, you are the boss and if you think that things get rough, inform your present-day that it’s not okay (however, never draw kids and their mother apart, she’s still their mother).

You may forget about spontaneity. If you opt for a spontaneous lover, you shouldn’t start a relationship with a single dad since it will involve a lot of planning. Yes, you’ll have to get back home in time because there’s literally a child to take care of (but maybe your date's kids will be adult, and it will be easier). But what is the point of having a sudden boyfriend when usually it involves ghosting, SPONTANEOUS disappearing, and other unpleasant things? When you want a steady relationship, go for a steady partner. Dating a single dad problem can be different, but this is definitely not the worst one.

He's got kids. It’s not a drawback if you like children. But the major drawback is that these children are not yours, they are exclusively his. Your goal as a stepmom is to make them your family as well. Sure, dating a single dad of teenagers is a little harder than being a mom to younger children. When kids don’t have that much retrospection yet, older children won’t be happy to see a new person in the family, whom they don’t trust. Especially if these events coincide with the most complicated years of their life when there are so many things to figure out on their own. But you shouldn’t blame yourself for their behavior, it’s typical of puberty age to be emotional, so nobody is to blame. You’ll just have to try a little better to become their friend, and chances are, you’ll have to try more than once.

Tips for Dating a Single Dad

How to date a single dad? There are no strategic steps, however, there are some things you want to address when talking to a single dad, like avoiding some topics about his ex, not getting messily involved in their family affairs, or involving in taking care of his children.

Dads are hard to get to because they are probably cautious of whom to choose in their inner circle. And dads have a narrow circle of friends and family since now he is the only support. If you want to get closer to the desired man and be a trustworthy partner, you should definitely listen to these pieces of advice:

Support him. If you want to be closer to a single dad, show that his life will change drastically since you will be around. You want to show not only how seductive you are, but how good you can cook, how easier life will be when you will be nearby, how much of a relief it will be for his children to finally share things with someone and get good advice and a womanly though. Show your amazing and gentle side, be a good caregiver, and always compliment your man for being such a good dad. And if he has some problems, just correct him in a subtle way without too much drama!

Beware and prepare for the ex. Yes, this is the worst side of the deal if there is such. His ex can be a real challenge, and she can give you a hard time a lot of times. Think cold when you deal with a woman who was dear to him. First off, she’s the mother of his children, and they probably love her very much. If his children are old enough, we recommend you get on good terms with this woman, since they can judge when to invite her even if the dad is embarrassed about these meetings. If you try to stop their connection, his children will not be happy. Just be wise and stay in your place.

Don’t try to be the new mom. Even if you are beautiful (just like the girl on ladies gallery) and smart, it doesn’t mean that you will be a mom for someone else’s child. These things can be annoying and creepy for older children, and small kids will be terrified and quickly despise a woman who’ll soon appear to them as an Evil Stepmother. If you don’t want them, never try to jump over your head and aim for impossible things. You can be caring, have heartfelt conversations with a child, but this place in the heart is simply irreplaceable, so if you don’t want to violate child’s memory, just be a good friend.

Be friends with the kids. This is what we are talking about. Be a cool mom, except never claim to be a mom, demand to call you mom or introduce yourself as a mom since it’s so ignorant, you’ll never know what kind of trauma this child has overcome. Be wise to stay in your place. You can’t do much, but you can be a main supportive system after the dad. Show a good team and try to invest in family activities (if kids aren’t against it). Resolve their conflicts, talk to them about school and relationships, but be cooler and let them do more, don’t restrain them too much to get on good terms with them.

Give him the space that he needs. Having a woman can be a little bit overwhelming for a man. So, if he wants some time alone of with his kids, don’t butt in. Don’t think it’s your fault or get offended, there’s nothing personal about this situation. Just ask if something is bothering him and if there are any things you want to correct together. But don’t worry too much anyway, he’ll be honest with you.

So, we have sorted out how to talk to a single dad, what problems are to expect when dealing with these issues and provide you with some tips in case you are struggling. But don’t worry, a single dad is always a treasure to hold tight, and there’s a chance you will make one more person happy. Be happy and confident, sincere in your intentions and true to your soul!