Dating Chinese Women: Ultimate Guide

Chinese culture may seem peculiar compared with every country out there. Chinese girlfriends are the best when it comes to integrity, sincerity, care and being honest about their feelings. I have tried lots of international dating agencies, but it was one summer in Chongqing that changed my life. It all started as a usual business trip, but turned into 20 years of the best relationships ever. I had to stay in China for some time to test the waters and examine all the peculiarities of dating Chinese woman. Of course, some things might appear openly weird an unnecessary, especially for the Westerner, but it feels better and better as long as you deeply emerge into this culture. So, without further ado, let’s talk about how to date a Chinese woman and what should you expect from it.

What are Chinese women like?

There is probably not a single woman who would be completely satisfied with her appearance, so Сhina girls are no exception. But the situation gets fueled by the fact that China has a cult of beauty. Influenced by Korean and Japanese fashion trends, Chinese girlfriends would spend incredible amounts of money to fix something that isn’t even there. We are talking about nose, jaw, chin and eye surgeries. They all want to have light eyes, long legs, fair skin and good hair. Sometimes a Chinese girl can become a real fashion victim, to the point she no longer looks like herself. Instead, you will look at a plastic hybrid. But surgeries are costly, so most of the women stay natural and preserve their cultural peculiarities.

Good looks in China are a guarantee of success, the opportunity to choose a prestigious boyfriend, to get a well-paid position. Employers prefer more beautiful candidates, as a beautiful face in Chinese culture equates to beautiful actions, and beautiful employees have much more chances to succeed. Also, more recently, in China, women over 27 years old who have been engaged in a career and don’t have kids yet have begun to diminish. The ruling party ordered to call them “leftovers” in order to force them to get married early and have children. That’s pretty cruel, huh?

What about their jobs? Fewer and fewer Chinese women are looking for an opportunity to entrust the management of their lives to their husband and build it on their own. At the same time, they are very ambitious: according to statistics, 76% of Chinese women are aimed at senior management positions, while in the US this figure is 52%, and in Russia the percentage is only 42%. Where does such a big difference come from? Women lived too long under the management of men; the politics of “one child-one family” doesn’t work anymore. Statistically, 8 out of 10 richest women in the world are Chinese.

Also, everything will depend on the background she came from. If she is from a small town, she is most likely to have some stupid prejudices, including obeying untold social rules, ‘just not to be embarrassing for her environment’. You can’t do a lot of things you would find normal in America, for instance, buying a half-broken car or dating a married woman in the past, because you will embarrass her and her family. A girl from suburbs will also be a little clingy and expect you to do everything for the family, but she will be an excellent housewife.

If the girl was raised in the capital city, she will be modern, hipster, addicted to fashion and a little bit more spoiled and selfish. Well, it’s not 100% since all of us are different. But again, beauty and money dictate a lot of things here.

Things Chinese women love in Western men

1. Western men are free-spirited. If you ever come across some Chinese women looking for love, they will tell the top difference between Chinese and foreign men is that the latter let themselves do whatever. Although Сhina girls are the most prudent and traditional, they want to experience something new. A man who can sell everything to travel the world, someone who dropped out of 6 colleges and still remains smart enough to earn money.

2. They are accepting. Chinese men will always try to track exes and be embarrassed if a girl had many partners. However, foreigners understand that life is life and you need to live it to its fullest. Dating a Chinese girl will mean that she will be subtle about all the past relationships and appreciate you don’t blame her.

3. Western men=a lot of money. There is still a stereotype that a white male equals money. It doesn’t even concern if you rent a cheapest flat and eat ramen all day, you still look like a presentable guy. A fellow Chinese man will wonder why you chose a Chinese woman when you can afford an American blonde with long legs and boobs. Besides that, having a foreigner as your husband is considered prestigious.

Reasons to date Chinese woman

1. Chinese girlfriends are loyal. They are sweet and will never betray you, because not only betrayal is sinful, it is against society, so it is against common sense. If a girl in a small town sleeps around, she is doomed forever. Reputation is everything in Asian countries, so not only will she be dedicated, she will also set the bar high.

2. They are open about your flaws. And this is totally a good thing. Sometimes you can only wonder how one manages to be so straightforward and in-your-face. If you meet Chinese girl, it will take her less than a second to ask why you have such a big pimple on your forehead and why are you so lazy to get a good job. No one will tell you the fakest American thing like ‘you are doing great’ or ‘you look good no matter what’. People actually care about your appearance, so it is not hard for them to be sincerely interested. They don’t think it’s bugging or rude to ask about personal things. And stuff like that makes you better. Like a grasp of fresh air.

3. They cook well. If you marry a Chinese girl, you are most likely in heaven. Chinese food is very tasty and various, so you will always be treated like a child, and she will be your mother forever. They are homely, warm and accepting.

4. They are family-oriented and don’t play games about your future. If they want kids and marriage, they will always let you know. Chinese women don’t speak in tongues when it comes to expressing their dreams. At least, you can expect everything to be clear and easy.

How to date Chinese women?

If you seek a Chinese woman for dating, you will need to learn something about their culture first.

Pecularities of Chinese dating culture: do`s and dont`s when dating:

DO: be a man. Carry her purse, pay for her meals and solve her problems.
DON’T: start a talk about feminism, unless you date a capital citizen. She simply won’t get it.

DO: give her time to be shy and prudent. It is not accepted for Chinese people to kiss each other in public and be vocal about your relationships if you are not serious about each other. If you sleep with her and switch to another person, you put her reputation at risk, and earn bad treatment from her family or colleagues.
DON’T: talk her into sex and dump her. Dating Chinese woman means sticking to some kind of commitment.

How to impress Chinese women:

• be interesting;
• be employed;
• express interest in her;
• express interest in her family;
• talk seriously.

Most important tips for dating:

• If you marry a Chinese girl, you marry her family. So while you are dating and want to get serious, you better start building relationships with her closest ones, which will be prioritized over you more than one time for sure.
• Treat her like a man. If you choose a Chinese woman for dating, she will totally accept traditional roles. When you try to change things that have been working for a hundred years, she will not be excited to meet your new solutions.
• Don’t upset her. Dating a Chinese girl will mean you need to explain yourself a lot. Don’t treat her like you are buddies.
• Plan everything. Dating in China means that you arrange all of the trips and dates, and she follows along. Sometimes it can be a little annoying not to see any action in the “manly department” from her.
• Meeting the family is a big step. Chinese women looking for love want a foreigner to be accepted by her family. If they like you, she will be very happy and grateful. It all depends on the family you will run into. If they are traditional, they will be suspicious about the foreigner, other times it should be all right.

Marrying a Chinese girl

A Chinese bride will be devoted. A Chinese bride will be caring and loving. If you want to make it all serious, you can expect 100% resourcefulness and passion from her. She will be a splendid wife – motherly and inviting. You should consult with her family and find a way to propose to her. If Chinese women are looking for love, they will stop and stay with one person for life. So, today we found out how to date a Chinese woman, figured out some tips and advices. Be sure you stay positive and serious about finding your true love!