Table of contents:
- What does sex look like with no feeling attached?
- Why is her laughter with a tint of sadness?
- How to narrow down the idea of sex
- Physical intimacy is a cheap currency
- Conclusion: choose physical intimacy or sexual passion
From a man’s point of view, there is plenty of sex without a kick above the waistline, which is hardly called real love. Many men prefer sex beyond everything else, which is simply a sign of incapability to extend intimacy to a higher level. They value their bodies starving for sex and freedom to dominate females in their undeniable and rightful entitlement.
In this matter, women remind just the correct food in the chain necessary to satiate and satisfy the hunger of more vigorous species. Coitus as a process is strictly defined by male physicality, which raises a fundamental question for any lady: can a man have sex with a woman without love for her? While it perfectly fits a male's interpretation, it doesn't necessarily have to fit a female's.
A woman's point claims the opposite view on intimacy as a far more complex process often confused with sex. The closeness a lady urges for can be achieved without the evolutionary coupling. Both views have the right to life and are available for consideration.
What does sex look like with no feeling attached?
Men and women expect different consequences from a sexual encounter other than sensation. Men would like to continue without investing much time and effort in building a fence around the bed. Women want to continue with higher quality suppressing their yearnings and remaining either cheap or expensive attraction.
Things might worsen with time if a guy sees a numb doll with the necessary orifices instead of a soul mate. Female vulnerability bothers him less than his own needs and requirements. Being insensitive, he won't find the time to fulfill her requests, investing his genetic material only.
Any woman looks for the commitment that is the brick-and-mortar of mature love. Such intimacy is rational for a heart but irrational for a penis, whose goal is dissemination. Every time she asks for more, she gets more promises that never come true.
When people first meet, they rarely find themselves out of bed, presuming it is love. For years, they attend to each other’s ebbs and flows, ignoring a missing feeling. They may still follow the endless explorations of their bodies, but a great deal of time and effort is lost.
A girl's crush on the wrong man for years of indifference leads to nothing but psyche devastation. Prone to break up, she will soon build her intimacy castle with another guy. They will experience all forms of devotion that she has never had.
Why is her laughter with a tint of sadness?
Nothing brings more satisfaction to a lady than a transparent future secured by someone who cares for it. It's opposed to what she has been through with a lethargic gentleman only woken up by an erection. He would never know her favorite flower because he had no interest in it.
What could a callous and selfish individual offer to a woman in love? Nothing but some sizable matters in exchange for her D cups, never trying to redraw the contours of her heart. It is not because he does not care but because he feels nothing and probably never will.
Sex is not love, and love is not sex
What you hear in popular songs, read in novels, and see in movies is all about love, not sex. Nothing matters to a lady but love conveyed in your protection, reliability, and resolution to build a family. As sweet as it can be, sex is just the basis for a more sublime feeling, which won't be confused with closeness.
Intimacy is trust, and trust is intimacy
No matter how deep her feelings are, your woman won't trust you with any personal information, especially concerning her health. You will get closer in bed, following your ancient instinct, but such momentary flashes of joy neither of you have to earn. Instead, that kind of trust is something you must earn and share.
Divisive nature of sex
Your practices with each new woman slowly but surely approach an end in your exploration of the depths of sexuality. Without a tender feeling towards each other, a newer, braver world won't open up for you, and your solitude will catch up in a year or two. A rolling wave of routine sex will push you back from each other, drastically decreasing your chances for a more committed relationship.
How to narrow down the idea of sex
Like any other guy, you wouldn't want to be vulnerable to anybody, neither physically nor emotionally. While young, you are pulling yourself out of the notion of romantic love favoring sexual relationships, but this path is gridlocked. The older you get, the more susceptible you become, and you realize the necessity of growing a deeper intimate connection with one woman, one and only.
As you move in together, your mutual capacity for intimacy will tend to its lowest figures. A few more memorable occasions on the couch and your love for the best woman on earth will be gone. Holding her for about a lifetime of such destructive relationships is an absolute catastrophe for her dignity.
Your fluid will dry off immediately after you finish, but you continue your sprint for no other reason but instinct, which barely testifies a family man in you. If you don't expect yourself to be bothered by a family, do not expect her loyalty and trust. A situative and temporary physical comfort that you offer is far not as enduring, especially in extreme circumstances.
She lacks a top ingredient in the recipe for her female happiness: your total commitment. Such a semi-commitment of yours makes your spouse's life semi-fulfilled, or, with more precision, she is suffering with you more than without you. A compassionate, empathic lady won’t tolerate emotional pain for long, always knowing that your egotism is the reason for her despair.
However, as soon as she is in the mood — you are right there, and this is what she clearly sees, rebukes, worries, and grieves. Poor girl, she would trade all your bedroom enthusiasm for your rationality and reliability in the foreseeable future together. If you do not have a plan for her, your communication will gradually but inevitably degrade.
She will eventually leave for new shores if you do not bring a different definition of love. Your semi-dream girl will kick you out of her life, offering boundaries that you won’t dare to trespass as soon as she realizes her body does not have to belong to you. Then, you will have to decide whether to stay pressing too forcefully or leave for good.
Physical intimacy is a cheap currency
A sexually compatible woman to share your bed with and without obligations could be nobody but a friend with benefits. Wild sexual activities have nothing to do with a family plan in the long run, especially if unclearly articulated from the beginning. A hot woman might change the way of your sex life, increasing sexual pleasure, but purely physical intimacy without soul contribution is a surrogate of love.
There is no power in your words and less in your deeds if you live up to anticipating pleasure each time you meet up. Each of you has a partner who views sex the same way as you do yet has no desire to work on a more meaningful commitment. Sex doesn’t change that.
Although your lady tends to see someone more established in you, such self-delusion will only postpone a rather inglorious end to your relationship. In a girly world, enjoying deep intimacy with someone who is rudimentary indifferent is a failure. Your potency won't postpone her feminine perception of you as a wrong choice in the history of her life.
Your physical presence does not affirm your psycho uninvolvement; it will ruin her urge to merge, devastating the space for love to grow. Your woman will start missing the moments of her deep loneliness, convincing herself she needs no one. Loving birds are too humble if separated and revitalized when united, but with you, it is different, unfortunately.
Conclusion: choose physical intimacy or sexual passion
A couple does not have sex because of love, nor do they love each other because of fantastic sex. It is always somewhere in the middle, like a tight-rope walker balancing over an abyss in the middle of his show. Any of you might come up with a rescue scenario of sexual abstinence applicable for both, but if practiced for a long time, it may cause physical and mental disorders.
Sex should never take a form of duty for either of you, which will never be if you enjoy it with respect for your feelings. It is always worth building a tight bond but doing it slowly, taking the appropriate time to fill in the lacunes of misapprehension. Your trust will grow simultaneously ahead of your grotesque physical dependability that evaporates so fast.
If there are no high expectations from one another, no premature implications, analysis, and comments will make you utterly infatuated with one another. No matter how hard you try to turn your woman on, your sex proves nothing but a passion that is miles away from real love. When the body speaks, you may read each other well, but it is still a funny endeavor to tune up the physical connection as a quintessence of a tribal mating game.
You probably have never considered distinguishing sexual passion and physical intimacy, but one supplements another. Most men and women experience a hardly suffocated desire when closeness is on the line. Intimacy lies beyond physical connection as an independent and self-reported feeling.
While physical connection can exist separately from psychological, sex drive often increases simultaneously with intimacy regardless of gender. Sincere affection is a paramount investor in your commitment that is irreducibly individual. The more tenderness you demonstrate in a romantic relationship, the less conflicting potential your relationship has.
With time passing, some couples suffer to keep the flame of their love ablaze, but only an honest perception of declining physical intimacy helps you find a remedy. No improvements in your bedroom interior can ignore the lack of connection between two hearts, and hope for the reversion back to your romantic state is miserable. It will solely demonstrate your confusion and exacerbate a lack of love.
The only way it will improve is through your active involvement and collaboration. What is terrifying is your accidental abstinence, but sometimes couples in love choose celibate voluntarily with minimal influence of medical conditions. This dramatically changes the dynamic of physical intimacy, making your relationship more platonic with sex as a more subordinate process, not a chief one.
Abstinence does not eliminate passion but removes primary forms of physical performance, and the quality of time spent together increases dramatically. How could that be, you wonder? Your routine sex life will be substituted with some unusual acts of devotion that could lead to great sexual arousal or breakup.
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