How to Fix a Boring Relationship: Tips and Advice


Do you recall the moments when you just started dating with tenderness because you were laughing all the time? When you watched a lot of movies but never manage to make it till the end? And your every date was so exciting and romantic? What happened? Where did all of this go? Do you feel how relationships have become a part of the daily grind, or even boring? The time has come to do something about it because otherwise, you will have to get rid of boredom in a more radical way.

my relationship is boring

Am I Bored with My Relationship?

Of course, if something is wrong, you will immediately notice it. But sometimes you need just to read a list of simple signs to understand when you get bored in a relationship. Hopefully, we have prepared one for you.

You no longer feel the excitement when you receive messages from your partner. Previously, any of their "Hi! How are you?” caused such a storm of emotions, as if they dashed off a whole love poem for you. And now you feel nothing.

You feel relief when they cancel the meeting. Because, if you honestly admit this to yourself, you would prefer to stay at home in front of the TV with a tray of ice cream and a cat in your arms.

Well, if they say they are going to a mission and will leave for a week, you (in your head) say, “Hurray! Freedom!"

You have got to the point when you are ready to leave as soon as possible because you are tired. You feel uncomfortable and want to take a decisive step but still postpone it.

During joint outings, you prefer to go to the cinema or to a concert because then you will not have to talk to each other. Besides, you prefer to meet immediately before the event to avoid any conversations.

You constantly want something to drink when you meet them. It’s unbearably boring to talk to them soberly, this awkward pause is killing and means only one thing, you bored in a relationship.

You do not dream about what you will do in the future, for example, “And in May we will get to the cottage, we will grill barbecues.” When they say something like that, you either feel nothing or feel irritation.

You go to meet your partner in the same clothes that you wear at work all day, you do not care about how you look and do not try to dress up.

You barely talk about your partner with your friends. What more is there to say?

Sex has become routine and monotonous. You just lie like a starfish until it's all over.

You do not have an orgasm with them and do not even bother to discuss this topic afterward. You did not even bother to tell them what was wrong or that you felt nothing.

It annoys you that you have to explain everything to them. At the beginning of the relationship, you thought it was cute but not now when feeling bored in a relationship.

You are already rehearsing a speech on the topic, “We must break up because our relationship gets boring.”

when a relationship gets boringSigns of a Boring Relationship

When talking about the general feel of you as a couple, not only explaining the "my relationship is boring because I feel bored" topic, it is worth considering some other signs (as well as ways out):

Things that you hadn't paid attention previously, like eating at a restaurant during dates or music at a nightclub, became very important to you. And now these minor aspects of dating mean a lot to you two. You were once so carried away by each other that the whole world didn't exist for your couple. But now things are different, and those are the signs of a boring relationship.

You no longer look into their eyes and say what you would like to do for your partner but rather complain. When you sit in a cafe, you are unhappy that the food is cold, and you sit so close to the kitchen. If you find the following signs in your relationship, it means you need to change something!

When your relationship is boring, you constantly do the same things. For example, Tuesday is going to the cinema day. On Wednesday you have dinner together and watch a movie. And this is not a cute tradition, but this predictability rather irritates you. You meet on a schedule, the anxious expectation has become a history of the past.

You constantly do the same stuff, and it never even occurs to you to try something new. Solution: turn dates into a game. One week your partner makes plans, and the next week you'll switch roles. Find out what is happening in the city, what's new in your area, try to occupy time with maximum interest and benefit.

When a relationship gets boring, money becomes an important issue. It is not necessary to spend all your savings on a rainy day on dates in a café with your partner, it would be just nice to show them your love from time to time. Solution: stop complaining every time you pull out a wallet. Why not buy your girlfriend those earrings she has been dreaming of?

The foreplay gets shorter and shorter. At the very beginning, you could spend at least a whole hour on it, and now you just undress, do a couple of warming up movements and get down to business. It's just about the satisfaction of natural needs. How to spice up a boring relationship in this case: give your partner a massage, buy some thematic handcuffs, you know everything perfectly well.

You no longer kiss. You used to just hold hands and peck each other on the cheek at the meeting. Now you barely touch each other when your partner comes home from work, and immediately sit down to eat. What to do when your relationship is boring: whenever possible, take the hand of your lover, hug them and kiss as much as you used to! Let the whole world wait. Stay with each other at least for a few minutes every day.

You no longer talk. Earlier you could talk about future plans, tell each other what you would like to do together, but now you chat only about everyday things. You discuss what car your friends have bought, or gossip about your relatives. How to keep a relationship from getting boring in this case: more smart talks! Ask your partner how they would act in different hypothetical situations, discuss the future, movies, books.

Why People Get Bored in Relationships

Relationships don't get boring one morning: something leads to this. Some of these points may not seem so bad to you, but they will help determine why relationships have lost intrigue. And do not forget that a relationship is a complicated thing, getting bored and experiencing your love transmitting into a routine can happen to anyone. You should just detect a precise reason for such a downturn in your romance before you think how to not get bored in a relationship anymore.

You've got lazy. You have been dating for some time, and now you no longer want to strain to try anything new and go to new places. You don't mind staying at home, and while your partner is watching movies, you do your own thing. Laziness does not define a relationship by itself, but it helps life plunge into despondency.

You've got used to each other. This is not so bad at all, but if you feel too comfortable next to each other, you stop working on spontaneity. Do something exciting and keep a mysterious aura around you! When you get used to a person, it may happen that they start thinking that you no longer value their company. Maybe you think that your beloved one will always be there, but life is tougher and does not give you any guarantees. How not to be boring in a relationship? Buy your lover a card, flowers, kiss them for no reason and all that jazz, you should constantly feed their awareness of how dear they are to you.

Sexually Bored in a Relationship: How to Cope with It

For a family to be stronger and learn how to not get bored in a relationship, you need to bring maximum diversity to your sex life. And before you do this, pay attention to three factors that affect the interest of the relationship.

Appearance. To make your sex interesting, you should look great and stay desirable. Therefore, take care of yourself: fitness, good nutrition, massage, do everything to make the reflection in the mirror satisfy you 100 percent.

Sexual libido. Remember, to diversify your sex life, you need to want sex. And for this, plan your time so as not to get tired during the day. To do this, delegate some of the household duties to your partner to have free time in the evening.

Diversity. The biggest mistake can be monotony. Your ace in the hole is unpredictability. A constantly changing image will always cause the desire of your partner.

For sex to be bright, add some simple rules to your relationship with your loved one. Believe us, they will give an excellent result.

  • when your relationship is boringFlirt. Even if you have been married for many years, do not neglect flirting with your own spouse. Spontaneous kisses, sexting, and seductive clothing are welcomed.
  • Romance. Regularly invite your partner to spend the evening somewhere outside the house. Let yourself have dates again.
  • Become active. Often show sexual interest in the partner, and actively provoke them to have sex.
  • Experiment. Do not be afraid of anything new. Offer your beloved something that they haven't tried yet.
  • Do not be shy. Watch erotic films and speak frankly about your desires.

How to Make a Boring Relationship Fun Again?

Finally, some more advice on how to revive the past excitement in your love story and forget about those boring days forever:

Continue to go on dates. Even if you have been together for more than one year and even if you live together, still do not stop going on dates. You can go to museums, go for a walk to the park or visit newly opened restaurants, just maintain the romance.

Be spontaneous. At the last moment, book movie tickets or reserve a table in a restaurant, go to a club in the middle of the night, decide everything on the go. You can even make a tattoo!

Changes are obligatory. Sometimes even the slightest change in appearance means a lot. Grow a beard, shave your head and you will see that your girlfriend will begin to perceive you a little differently. And if you are a female, there is plenty of room for experiments with appearance.

Engage in sports together. It often happens that couples who play sports together get more pleasure from each other. For example, they have better sex. Good reason to sign up to the gym, do not you think?

Learn together. Take your partner to dance, to cooking classes, or sign up to courses to learn a foreign language, anyway there are lots of options! Whatever you choose, do it together and have fun.

Spend less time together. On the contrary, being together 24 hours a day, seven days a week is not a good idea: mystery and novelty are lost. Spend more time apart and give each other a reason to miss a partner. If you live together, you must have a special private time.

Change habits. If you feel that relationships are drowning in everyday routine, then it’s time to make changes to your everyday common affairs. Are you used to getting out to a restaurant? Try going to the theater. If, on the contrary, you usually have dinner at home, discover the restaurant menu.

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