Great Tips on Approaching Women in Public

No doubt, dating apps and websites are the most popular venues for approaching women these days. But most of the time you live in a real world, not the virtual one so you need to be ready for approaching women 24/7. What if you walk down the street and spot a very attractive girl? Or some beauty winks at you in the gym. Or you have lunch in a café and she sits at the next table. There are two options: you either freak out and miss your chance or you approach her and have an effective dialog/get her number/go on a date right away. If you want to meet your fate, you should grab every chance and not be afraid of approaching women in public, because, let’s face it, public places, not secluded corners of your neighborhood, are full of potential dates.

approaching women in public

Best ways to approach women

The main rule you must learn is that approaching women in public doesn’t differ from approaching women in any other place. Another truth is that it’s not as difficult and twisted as it is told by pickup artists. Everything is much simpler. There are two things required from you – your desire to approach the girl and your confidence. Usually, it goes like this, you have a desire but something prevents you from making the first move. Your main enemy is a lack of confidence caused by the fear of rejection, fear of what other people will think, fear of appearing ridiculous. Another barrier is poor communication skills.

The good news is that all these fears can be treated with regular practice. You can read expert tips on this matter but they will not bring any results unless you use them in real life. Chatting up girls is a kind of art but everyone can master it. The most important thing is to choose the right moment. It doesn’t really matter what you’ll say as an opening phrase as long as you approach her properly. What does it mean ‘properly’? There should be a prolonged eye contact between you first. It’s a sign for you that she may be interested in you. In this case, a simple “Hi” will be a great opener.

At the same time, you should avoid trite conversation starters. Instead, come up with a line that will suit the situation. For example, focus on some detail and ask her about it. “Where did you get this lovely tan?” “What is the book you’re reading?” “That’s a very interesting ring.” Women appreciate this way of approaching. You can also be more straightforward in your approaching style and say something like: “Hi. I came up because I want to meet you”, or “I just couldn’t pass you by.” This way you demonstrate your resoluteness and fearlessness. The probability of success is extremely high.

If you experience a strong fear of disapproval when you want to approach women in public, you should understand that most people feel the same. And if you think that all eyes will be on you when you’ll venture to chat some girl up, you’re right. But what you should know is that people will respect you and view you as a really courageous guy. You may even inspire some men to follow your example.

The root of the fear of approaching girls is lack of communication with new people. And you must deal with it. There are many techniques you can use to get rid of your fears. Still, all of them are based on regular practice. Give yourself a task to approach new people, men and women of different ages, irrespective of whether you find them attractive or not. how to approach a woman​Get the experience of how to approach older women, younger ladies, and girls of your age. Do it for about a week but on a daily basis. You can ask the time, pretend to conduct a public opinion poll, collect signatures, etc. Don’t make taking a girl’s number your main aim. Talk with people you approach, watch their reaction to you. If you approach at least 10 people a day, your fear will disappear in a week. Once you’ve dealt with your fear, you can start approaching those girls you’re really interested in.

Another important point for consideration is your appearance. You definitely have better chances if you’re dressed smartly, have a neat haircut and nice cologne.

Approach women in bars

Despite the fact that the bar is not the best place to find a partner for a serious relationship, bars are still one of the most popular places for meeting girls. Many ladies go there with their friends to wind down, dance, and meet new people. The bar counter is the place traditionally considered as the best point for meeting someone attractive and alone. Bartenders can confirm this. Your two main tools when approaching women at bars should be your confidence and originality. Such regular phrase as “Can I buy you a drink?” will not “hook” the object of your interest, while some fact about the cocktail you drink or she drinks can arouse a big deal of interest in her.

How should you build your tactics? First of all, don’t rush to meet girls randomly. Look around, order a drink, get comfortable, look around again filtering girls that don’t seem to be willing to be approached. If you normally don’t go to bars because those are not your element, don’t force yourself, as it will only cause additional anxiety.

Second of all, chat with a bartender. Bartenders are local matchmakers – they can point at those girls who came here alone or those who would not mind meeting you. Also, if girls see that you talk with a bartender, they will think of you as of an interesting, sociable, and active guy.

Third, choose the moment, come up to her and start a conversation. If she is with her friends, address the whole group and maintain a small conversation with all of them, then gradually steal the girl you’re interested in. If you are with your friends, approach the group of girls together with your group.

Ways to approach a girl at the bar:

  • Use your body language: eye contact, smiling, raising your glass to her, winking.
  • Buy her a drink saying something original.
  • If she goes out to smoke, follow her and offer to light up her cigarette.
  • Ask her to a dance.
  • Ask her to join you at your table.
  • Help her get rid of a pushy admirer.
  • Offer her to take a stroll in the streets of a night city.
  • Ask her to take a selfie, saying that you already have a photo with Jennifer Lopes and you want a selfie with a more beautiful girl.
  • Be active and make yourself noticeable. Play billiards, dance, chat with a bartender or laugh with your buddies.

What can repel a girl? Your untidy look, bragging, obtrusive behavior, too much alcohol. If a girl notices that you approach girls one after another, she may not want to be one of many.

Approach women at the gym

Approaching women at the gym is not always a good idea. However, everything depends on a particular woman. Some girls go to the gym with one aim – that of getting fitter. They are focused on this aim and don’t want to be bothered during their workout. Moreover, most of them don’t want to attract much male attention as they don’t look their best in the gym. But there are girls who go to the gym just for maintaining their good figures and they are not against some flirting during their workout sessions.

If you regularly go to one gym, you may want to use this public place as a venue for approaching women who go there too. However, it’s crucial to follow certain rules in order not to screw things up.

  • Start small. Attend the gym regularly so that she will get used to seeing you and even start recognizing you. She should think you are here to improve your body, not pick up girls.
  • Wait for the right moment. Before you choose the moment to approach her, do everything to establish a certain contact between you. How to do that? With your eyes. Those should be quick glimpses with no smiling or winking. She shouldn’t think you want to win her attention.
  • approaching women at the gymPick the right moment. Generally, girls are quite positive about the acquaintances at the gym. It’s not a bad idea to meet someone who is also into sport and healthy lifestyle. Yet, none of them would be happy if you approach them in the middle of some exhausting exercise. So keep in mind the right timing. You can safely approach a girl during the pause between the exercises or when she leaves the gym. The latter option is better since both of you leave the gym after taking shower, so there will be no off-putting factors.
  • Be careful with compliments. You should shift your focus from her appearance to her performance if you don’t want to spoil everything. Praise her technique, her muscle work, compliment the way she does squats or whatever she does.
  • Be patient. Don’t try to rush things. She shouldn’t think you’re a maniac. Go to the gym regularly, chat with her occasionally, and demonstrate that you don’t have any pretensions. If you find out she doesn’t have a boyfriend, ask her to go for a coffee with you someday.

Approach women on the streets and in the parks

One of the most popular, though quite feared, ways of meeting girls is approaching women on the street. Women always seem so busy during the daytime, and the chances to get the answer “I don’t meet men on the street” are high too. But if you do everything right, you can successfully approach any girl. Here are some tips for you.

To boost your chances for success, make sure you have a stylish neat look. If a vagabond-like guy approaches a girl, she’ll just ignore him and go ahead. So make sure your look doesn’t scare people off.

  • Mind the way you walk. Your step should be light, slow, and confident. It will give off the right impression and give you extra time to size her up.
  • Try to look the female passers-by in the eyes. This way you’ll see which girls are open to communication. Don’t approach her from behind and don’t grab her by her elbow. She’ll freak out. Walk on the level, then go ahead leaving her a bit behind, and then walk up to her face to face.
  • If she is sitting on a bench, don’t hang over her but sit next to her.
  • If you exchanged friendly smiles, don’t hesitate but come up with her and chat her up.
  • Never talk with her back. Overtake her a bit and say what you want to say.
  • Start with a compliment or something appropriate to the situation.

If you want to approach a girl in the park, do it at the right time of the day – not too early in the morning or too late in the evening. You shouldn’t cross the boundaries of her personal space otherwise she may think you’re a maniac. Also, try to approach her not in a deserted part of the park – she’ll feel safer if there are people around.

How to get women to approach you

Now that you know how to approach women in public places, you may wonder: do women approach men? The most confident and liberated of them do. Of course, all of them want you to make the first move. However, it’s always the woman who signals her interest in you and encourages you to approach her.

Women approaching men is not a rare case today. Especially if it’s the case of an older woman and a younger man. You can send signals for approaching just the way women do. You can look them in the eyes, smile at them, use your body language (stand in an open position, move in a confident way), radiate positivity, be involved in some activity. However, if a woman approaches you, you should take the initiative and lead the conversation. She helped you skip the how to approach a woman stage, so show your gratitude to her by not making her regret this move.

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